The “that’s Beijing” Bump

As some of my loyalists know, I was once a regular contributer to the “that’s Beijing forum,” now known as “the beijinger.” If you have any interest in discussing the implications of white dudes having indiscriminate sex (aka “dating”) Chinese women, you should check it out their site. I still weigh in on important matters from time to time, for example setting the record straight on the correct way to describe lower back tattoos. As I recently explained to a misguided fool who used the term “whorestamp”:

Incorrect usage. Proper term is “tramp stamp” and only applies to lower back tattoos. While “whorestamp” is often used, it is what those in the biz would call a “needless variant”–all that is gained is increased misogyny, at the cost of losing the rhyming scheme of “tramp” and “stamp.”

This moniker is already considered passe and should be avoided. Unless you are writing an Adam Sandler movie or something like that.

Such times, when I feel compelled to enlighten the masses, are few and far between these days. Regardless, the people who run that’s Beijing saw fit to include my blog as one of their featured “links of the week” in their most recent email newsletter.  Here is what they said:

Everyone’s favorite warlord contributor to thebeijinger.com forum, Yan Xishan, now has his own blog where you too can join his Juicy Pants Army.

Impressed, I braced my blog for the massive influx of readers who surely click the “links of the week” that the newsletter overlords provide for them. And what was the “that’s Beijing bump”?

One click. Although to be fair, perhaps most of the readers of the newsletter were not smart enough to get around the Great Firewall of China.

Luckily for me, everyone doing web searches for “Ma Bufang,” “beijing whores,” or “national shame china” will be quickly directed to 1941’s most noteworthy warlord.

That would be me, FYI.

4 Responses to The “that’s Beijing” Bump

  1. Dang, we shoulda coded a proxy into the URL.

  2. Yan Xishan says:

    Next time. Live and learn.

  3. sundaylovers says:

    I’m sorry, Yan Xishan, but even the firewall can’t excuse those pesky forum members of failing to visit your noble site, as WordPress remains still one of the few blog sites that remains freely viewable to the Chinese masses. Perhaps we can chalk it up to simple ignorance and an unappreciation for genius?

    By the way, I’m always looking for neologisms pertaining to: soul patches, dreadlocks, white douchebags who have chinese character tatooed on their bodies, slutty xiaojies who hang out with aforementioned white douchebags, etc. Please advise.

  4. boyce says:

    YXS,

    If only the Juicy Pants Army had a great firewall at its disposal on the battlefield…

    Anyway, you get my vote in the Best Blog Written by a Warlord Posting from the Twentieth Century category.

    Cheers, Boyce

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